Which fool decided to put the car park down there?

Saturday 23rd June. Celtic Cup round 3 - Pontypool

In the morning I awake,
My arms, my legs, my body aches,
The sky outside is wet and grey.
So begins another weary day.
So begins another walk up that bloody hill from the car park with skis and boots and benches and wax boxes and fold up chairs and moaning kids

Apologies to Nutty Boy connoisseurs for the final line but Grey Day by Madness could never have been more appropriate. Pontypool is a fantastic facility deep in the Welsh valleys – well to be more precise the slope itself is in Pontypool. The car park however seems to be somewhere on the outskirts of Merthyr Tydfil. Still if you’ve never been before, just imagine the fun in hiking all your gear and a couple of grumpy kids over a valley and a half of welsh parkland. Indeed, if you possess more arms that the Chinese military, the endurance of a camel and the patience of a saint then it’s a doddle. Otherwise, pretend you’re in a rush to get the boy on the slope in time for practice and promote the other half to the position of senior logistics co-ordinator. Viola, problem solved.

Saturday’s racing was split into two races. A morning & lunchtime two run slalom and a late afternoon single run GS. The slalom saw success for Jordan Fellows who, after shading the first run, blitzed the field on run 2 to claim a comfortable win. Nathan Breese again posted a brace of immaculate runs to claim a fine 6th place despite gravity not really being all that helpful.

In the Girls race Abby Clifford missed out with a dnf but Charlotte Gould ensured that Telford were represented within the overall top 20 and claimed 8th position in category. Charlotte Shrimpton posted her best result of the season by taking 23rd overall and 6th in category and George Gould collected her personal best tally of seed points with a pair of great runs to finish 8th in category and 28th overall

In the boys Ashley Breese posted the best single run of the day from a Telford racer and followed it up with another belter in the second run to claim 2nd in category and 22nd overall. Jake Williams claimed his first podium of the season, collecting 3rd in chi 2 with Joe Humfress, adapting to life on new skis, not far behind in 8th. Ben Cooper, also on new Atomics, endured another frustrating slalom after bursting out of his bindings on run 1 but still went on to post a brace of finishes in claiming 15th in category.

The afternoon GS was an altogether new affair for many of the Telford Racers. In the minis Nathan Breese claimed 11th place and Jordan claimed another podium place in 2nd. In the females, Abby Clifford ended the day on a high with 6th overall & 3rd in category, Charlie Gould defied even her own expectations with 13th overall and 3rd in category and Charlotte Shrimpton and George Gould both impressed on plastic GS debuts with overall finishes of 24th & 37th respectively.

In the boys, Jake Williams scorched to a superb win in category, Ashley Breese posted 2nd in category, Joe Humfress claimed 13th in children 2 and to the sound of a standing ovation and sighs of relief that could be heard back all the way in the Midlands Ben Cooper collected his first ever national podium position after blasting to 3rd place in chi 2.

Sunday 24th June. Celtic Cup Round 4 - Pontypool

Sunday’s slalom was a slightly more jaded affair as we all felt the after effects of another leg busting climb up the path and the longest racing day of the year 24 hours earlier. In the minis Jordan Fellows survived a 180 mid air spin to claim 2nd and Nathan Breese again proved his sound technique with a fine 6th place finish.

In the Girls, Charlotte Gould survived a mis-placed pole out of the start of run 1 to post 20th place and sister George bettered her performance of the previous day with a fantastic 22nd and sub 200 seed points.

In the boys Ashley Breese let victory slip through is fingers (or legs to be more precise) with a final gate straddle, Jake Williams claimed a great 2nd in category and Joe Humfress can look forward to the publishing of the next set of seed points after improving his seed point ranking in claiming a great 9th place in chi 2.

Storm Clouds Blown Away By Sharp Breese

Saturday 15th June - Sunderland Club National

Rarely do you get a decent Friday afternoon motorway drive, it’s a familiar drill of stop-start-stop on the tarmac and a proverbial cry of “are we there yet” from the back as you nudge bumper to bumper through Wednesbury High Street. This particular Friday afternoon, however, took frustration to an altogether different level. With the global warming induced monsoon season in full swing and the Bloxwich Farmers Guild considering converting their land into paddy fields on a full time basis a small but determined band of Telford racers crawled their way north. The only certainty being that it was a long way and that they were never going to make Friday night practice.

Saturday’s Club National was no less of a test of endurance. Given a course that threw out more people than a stressed night-club bouncer it was clear that whilst the quest for speed was still the key, thoughts of survival wouldn’t be all that far behind.

And so it proved as Ashley compiled a brace of morning dnf’s to bring a premature end to his day with Ben Cooper, after posting a time in run 2, following suit in his 3rd run.

In the Girls, Ellen Brown proved that endurance was the key as she scored increasingly quicker times through the day in claiming a great 5th place in Chi 1 and sister Claire followed suit with progressively faster runs to claim an excellent 5th in Chi 2. In the Junior categories Charlotte Gould also posted a trio of increasingly impressive times to claim an excellent 6th in category, 16th overall and sub 100 seed points, a performance eclipsed only by Abby Clifford who scored a win in category, 2nd place overall and notched the fastest female time of the day.

In the minis Jordan Fellows failed to capitalise on an excellent morning with a 3rd run mistake leading to a hefty wipe-out, a face full of matting and the inevitable dnf. However man of the day has to go to Nathan Breese, who claimed what will surely be the first of many Club National wins. In a category dominated by dnf’s the Pocket Rocket produced three flawless runs to take victory as his more experienced counterparts struggled to cope with the course conditions. Well done lad.

Sunday 16th June - Sunderland Grand Prix

As with the previous days Club National course, the Sunday Grand Prix collected more than it's fair share of dnf's & dsq's. Abby, Ashley & Charlotte's day was all over before it really got underway with run 1 disappointments. However Claire Brown kept the Telford flag flying posting another impressive brace of times to claim a highly creditable 6th place in category and 23rd overall.

Girls, Girls, Girls

10th June – Wycombe Club National

What a complex! A six lane athletics track, squash courts, tennis courts, a gym, a physiotherapy, an olympic sized cycling track and a rather smart and steep dry ski slope. You don’t get this on a council estate in Wednesbury. Add in 180 of the best UK dry slope racers out there and you’ll find that that despite the sun being in skin burning form all of the real scorching was being done on the matting.

With the Breese brothers absent it was left to Jordan to fly solo in a hotly contested minis race, eventually claiming a decent 2nd place finish after a his morning was compromised with a 1st run dnf.

Apart from that it was girls, girls, girls as Charlotte Shrimpton again proved a model of consistency in claiming 9th place in a really competitive Chi 2. Claire Brown edged in front of Charlotte squeezing into 9th place posting identical times in runs 1 & 3. Sister Becky matched her feat with an impressive 8th in Junior 1 on debut and Ellen went sub 250 points in claiming 10th place in Children 1.

The Gould Girls suffered triple disappointment however as an injury from the Stoke race 24 hours earlier forced the withdrawl of Squeak and Bird threw away a fantastic opportunity to take her seed points into double figures with a third run 360, after absolutely nailing the tricky hairpin. The pair then had to watch in horror as mum Jane turned all florescent and officious with a spot of third round gate judging. Fair play to Charlotte however. With mum patrolling the bottom two gates like Admiral Lord Nelson marshalling the fleet at Waterloo, Bird had the good sense to cross the finish line as far away from mum as possible, therefore limiting the possibility of receiving a hefty whack around the back of the head from a low flying clip board. By God, she’s power mad that woman.

The Three Muskeskiers

9th June – Suffolk Club National

Brilliant viewing, ample parking, 180 metres of good quality Dendix and a really interesting terrain all go towards making Ipswich the best event of the Club National calendar. Only three Telford racers made the trip down the A14 however but all came away with great results.

In a really competitive children 1 category, Ashley claimed a joint 2nd and managed to post a 1st ever top 30 overall placing despite being hampered on run 3 by an out of control right hand pole which prevented any real acceleration out of the gate. In the minis, Telford racers dominated the prizes with Nathan producing three faultless runs and one breath taking stamping of the second gate down for a superb 3rd place and Jordan scored the three fastest times of the day in category the claim a fine 1st place.


9th June - Stoke Fun Race #3
Another great turnout from Telford competed in the third and penultimate round of the popular summer race series. On the slope Emma Taylor raced to second place in the U8 girls, Claire Ainsworth and Emily Humfress both went one better and made it a hat trick of series wins in the girls U10 & U12 categories. Charlotte Shrimpton claimed 3rd in the U14s and Kirsty Thomas claimed another win in the unregistered under 16 category. Girl of the day however was Charlotte Gould who blitzed the field to claim victory in category and the overall female crown.

In the boys, William Lucas claimed 2nd in the U8’s with Joshua Ainsworth claiming 5th. In the U14 category Joe Humfress impressed with a great 2nd place, Marco Furio claimed 5th and Adam Buffrey placed 10th. The U12’s saw William Haycox shade brother Adam, claiming 8th & 9th places respectively and Charlie Haycox claimed an excellent 4th place in the U10’s. Man of the day however went to Daniel Taylor who blasted to his first ever race win and became the third Telford racer to win the U10’s in this series. Well done Dan.

Green Matting, Sheep and Sunshine

Saturday 2nd June – Pendle Club National
And so the ski circus moved on to Pendle, hill of the witches (and sheep dung). Where if the sun shines then the view is majestic, but if the clouds win the battle then you know that you’re going to get drenched. Add in 130 metres of green rolling Dendix and speed sapping flatness and you realise that if ever there was a slope that offered maximum home advantage then this is it.

Again, Telford racers were out in big numbers, Emily Humfress notably making her Club National debut. In the minis Jordan produced three solid runs for 3rd place and Nathan, after remembering to take both his poles down with him on runs 2 & 3 placed 7th, again finding himself as the highest place non-1997 born racer. In the girls Ellen Brown claimed a fine 6th place in Chi 1 nudging Emily Humfress into 7th. In chi 2, the soon to be renamed Georgina ‘Squeak’ Gould finished in 18th, Charlotte Shrimpton was a model of consistency in 11th and Claire Brown squeezed into 10th, also claiming a place in the overall top 30. In the junior ranks Abby Clifford swept to victory in category and 4th overall despite her morning being compromised with a 1st run DNF and Charlotte Gould posted another fine finish with 7th in Junior 1.

In the boys Ashley Breese claimed the honours with an excellent 3rd place in chi 1 and Joseph Humfress built upon his early season promise to place 14th in chi 2. However man of the day (and you might need to be seated at this point!) goes to Ben Cooper who finally, finally, finally added a 3rd run time to a decent morning and collected 12th place in category and sub 250 seed points.

Sunday 3rd June – Pendle Grand Prix
A smaller representation from Telford for the Grand Prix saw Abby Clifford go one better than her Saturday result in collecting 3rd overall to add to another win in Junior 2. Ashley Breese found himself just edged off the podium in 4th and Charlotte Gould can again be pleased with her weekend’s performance with a solid 8th place in Junior 1.